For a brief moment the world has stopped. Everyone has left the house and I am here by myself. I grabbed a cold drink and went to my back patio to just sit and take it all in. The smell of the fresh cut grass. A warm summer breeze is moving the leaves of the tall trees and I can smell the rhododendrons across the yard. I can hear the birds call and can see the bugs working from plant to plant. The spider works on a web, finishing a perfect design. In the distance I hear a hammer and farther away a saw as folks work on local homes. But right here, in my yard, it’s just me, the breeze and my thoughts.

So many things fighting for the prominent position in my mind. Worries, fears, appointments, follow ups, business, kids, doctors, love, faith and frustration. It is always hard for me to focus and it should be even harder right now.

But it’s not.

I know that I could spend hours thinking and worrying about everything. Will the oncologist care about Triann. Will they operate in time. Will the tumor metastasize and spread. Will she make it. Will I be able to do this on my own. Can I keep our business going on my own. Can I care of the kids while she is sick. Can I care for the kids if the worst happens. Does God know the outcome. Can God change the outcome. Is my faith enough. Am I being a good example. Does Triann know how much I love her. Does Triann feel like I have her back. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING AGAIN.

I chose not to put question marks on any of the statements above because they are not questions. I know the answer to them all. I KNOW that God will give me the strength to get through this. I KNOW that God will give Triann the strength to get though this. I KNOW that God can use this to strengthen and encourage others. HE has been part of our life and has given us the strength to get through everything. He hasn’t caused the hardships but He has used the hardships to show us how much we are capable of if we simply trust in Him.

TRUST

IN

HIM

There will be times through this journey, like all others that we have been on and all others that are yet to come, that I will need to look back on this. I will need to remind myself in that moment of doubt. I will need to remind myself in the moment of worry. I will need to remind myself in that moment of despair…

TRUST

IN

HIM

And in those moments, I will turn to Him, I will tell Him that I can’t do it on my own. I will tell Him that I am scared, worried, full of despair. And before the prayer is out of my mouth, before the thought has left my mind, He will bring me back to this place. The place that I am sitting in right now.

The smell of the fresh cut grass. A warm summer breeze is moving the leaves of the tall trees and I can smell the rhododendrons across the yard. I can hear the birds call and can see the bugs working from plant to plant. The spider works on a web, finishing a perfect design. In the distance I hear a hammer and farther away a saw as folks work on local homes. But right here, in my yard, it’s just me, the breeze and my thoughts.