We are headed back to MD Anderson in two weeks! I am looking forward to the trip because I would like to be able to breathe a sigh of relief until the next visit. (Keep those prayers coming!)
However…there is also the anxiety (fear) that things won’t be OK.
Eric and I have the conversation often that I don’t have cancer, I’m simply on chemo.
There has not been a sign of cancer since the tumor was removed in October – PRAISE the LORD!!
However, I am still on high doses of chemo and have still not reached the ‘optimal’ level of the drug in my system.
I have had a really rough month with getting my pills in. Stomach aches, stomach cramps, nausea, vomiting, GI issues galore. I don’t know if it is the heat or the stress of the move, the kids and their medical things recently. Perhaps it is simply the meds. Hmmm. Or a combo of it all. I am now getting the dizziness back in full force like I had a few months ago. Ugh. But wanting, NEEDING more time with my family is my driving force to continue to take the Mitotane.
Adrenal Cancer is RARE. Stage 2 Adrenal Cancer is VERY rare! A tremendous gift that that this terrible disease was found so early! Thank you God and thank you Daniel.
I actually find it difficult to scold him when he jumps on me, but I have to. Especially since my incision site is still tender!
I really believe that God can hand me many more years here on this earth with Eric and Emily and Daniel.
But it is such a mental game.
Please pray for my overall health. My medication intake. My upcoming scans. My family – it is really taxing on Eric and so hard for the kids to understand why mommy is always tired and not feeling well. Emily told me today that she wanted me to get some rest so I didn’t get sick again. Daniel has always been clingy, but it is getting ridiculous. I hate that my kiddos, esp Emily, are being forced to grow up too fast. I hate cancer. But I love the Lord and I know He loves me. That He cares about my family. I need to continue to put my trust and my hope in Him alone.
I am up tonight with heartburn and an upset stomach. But I am so tired and dizzy it is hard to stay upright. Now what do I do??
I suppose I will sign off for now and catch up with y’all later.
My Mom will be flying down for this trip to Houston to keep the kiddos entertained while Eric and I are at the hospital for long and grueling days! I am thankful she is able to take the time off and come help. I know it is tough on my parents to not be closer.
Thank you -again – to Amy and Christophe for donating hotel points for our stay.
Thank you to my Mops group for the great freezer meals this month.
Thank you to my in-laws for giving me a couple of naps while they are here visiting.
Thank you to Belinda for taking the kids on separate outings. For making them feel special and giving them a chance to get out of the craziness for awhile.
I am certain there are others I am missing, so thank you to all of you who have been praying for us and lending a hand. We couldn’t do it without you.
Goodnight.